When I got into mid life I suddenly realized I had some things to heal.
Money wasn’t workin, men weren't workin, I was sick & exhausted all the time and I truly was my biggest critic.
I hated myself, my life & I knew I was meant for so much more.
I got divorced at 38 and spent the first couple of years after just playing, but then life set in. I realized if I truly was going to receive what I desired I had to become the version of myself that could receive it.
Does the below sound like you…
√ I was guarded & I had a bunch of armor up to protect me.
√ I constantly compared myself to others & felt insecure all the time.
√ I was sick. A lifetime of viruses, low frequencies, bad eating and self criticism had caught up to me. My hair was thinning, my body was aching, I couldn’t function and I was exhausted. My hormones were a mess and my thyroid & adrenals were shot. I had to take control of my health right then or pay severe consequences in a few years if not.
√ I was incredibly insecure when it came to men & relationships. I thought men wouldn’t want me, especially since they had young women full of estrogen available to them, & I compared myself to younger women all the time.
√ I judged myself for where my life was…I should be further along in my life & career, how could my finances be like this, I don’t have kids, I’m single blah blah…I was embarrassed about me & where I was at in life. I should have accomplished more by this time & I felt like time was running out.
√ And I was the worst critic of myself. I still after all these years hadn’t learned to love myself. I had no faith in God or myself. I was constantly in fear that things were going to fall apart & would often find myself in a fetal position on the floor because I was so distraught. I couldn't find pleasure in life...I was empty.
I didn’t feel safe
I didn’t feel good or happy
I didn’t feel abundant
I didn’t feel supported
And I didn't feel chosen
Truth be told the first six years of my 40’s were actually some of the hardest in my life.
And it was an accumulation of what I believed to be true about myself that led me to that point.
I didn’t think things worked for me. They worked for others, but not for me.
I knew I needed to do something drastically different in order to begin to thrive in mid life.